It’s official, I no longer use my maiden name. The one place I haven’t changed it on record is at my university because I’m waiting until I get my diploma for my BA. After that, I will use my married name and apply with that for grad school.
Even before I changed important things like my Social Security card and my bank accounts, our mail started being addressed to me as Fitzgerald. I was ok with that.
It was a bit unsettling though, when I changed my name at work. I got a new mailbox file in a new location because I’m no longer in the A’s. Of course, no one told me so I thought maybe someone removed it because I was being fired (not likely but I’m far from being a valued employee). Even after I asked about my mailbox, no one decided to tell me that my log-in information had changed. We sign in using an ID that has part of our last name in it. They changed mine without warning me so I couldn’t log in properly. Maybe it was the lost feeling at work that made me upset, but I really didn’t like the change.
After a week of working with my new mailbox and what not, I was starting getting used to writing my new name over and over for things. It wasn’t until the attendance sheet at school that we have to sign, that I forgot which name to write. I’m still Azzarello at school, and it was a little sad that after today, I won’t get to write that anymore. (Today is my last day of classes.)
A lot of women are excited for their new last name. I would have been if I married into an Italian family but I didn’t so it’s definitely more traumatic than exciting for me. My name tells people where in Italy my family is from. Azzarello isn’t a common last name so that’s special too. If it were a perfect world, sharing last names wouldn’t be the norm and husbands taking their wives last names would be acceptable.
Side notes: I do like what my initials spell now and it was the inspiration for my tattoo. I want another leaf tattoo soon. And my new signature looks cool with the F instead of A.
I too had a really hard time taking my husband’s name. Holding my new social security card and driver’s license made me feel like the old me had died. I like being an A instead of an H, but when other people call my name both my new and maiden name sound foreign to me. I’m getting there.
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